SATURDAY

Ugh. There’s no getting away from it: the NEC is a pisshole, with all the charm of a Belgian airport. Thank fuck Gama Bomb are here to cheer things up. Possibly Ireland’s answer to Muncipal Waste, they have a more retro side to them, with Philly Bryne’s high keening cry recalling Anthrax at their best.

“The atmosphere’s electric” Ted Maul guitarist Luca sarcastically drawls during a lengthy soundcheck. With the stage times already running an hour behind, and no bar, it’s clear the band are just as restless as the crowd. Opening number ‘Spherical Lie’ is subject to horrible mutilation from a crap sound, but their recover their composure, and the two newbies aired at the end of their set show what they can do when they’re at full throttle. SJ

Recently reborn, punk loving, death metal brood The Rotted, proceed to rip off the sterile faces of today’s crowd, after all everyone’s accepted the fact the only redeeming feature of this weekend is the line-up.

Whereas The Rotted left brains and jaws on the floor, Malefice simply prance about with masculine aplomb and rely on a handful of riffs to impress today’s exasperated revellers, not too bad if repetitive face-smashing is what you want, it just becomes a bit boring when you’re wondering how long it will take you to get to the pub and drink a pint before the next band is on. LM

The main stage is thankfully in possession of a good sound (wasted on the hard rock pomp of Blaze Bayley), local boys Benediction blow away any feelings of apathy among the sparse crowd who have willed themselves to stay despite the depressing venue.  In front of a home crowd, they set about their set with obvious glee, with their death metal racket comparing favourably with fellow Midlanders Bolt Thrower.

If ever there’s a band completely unfazed by anything, it’s Anvil. Anyone who’s seen their film will know they’ve played sparser and shittier venues than this, and being hoary old metal warriors, they don’t disappoint, with ‘Metal On Metal’ being a resounding crowd pleaser, along with an old school drum solo. SJ

Saxon are simply put, Saxon! Metal as fuck, there’s more metallic nobility in Biff’s left testicle than most and their rehearsed appearance is noticeable, after all it’s the umpteenth festival appearance this year. A tax bill must be due. Enjoyable and enchanting as ever, metal as fuck! LM

SUNDAY

While the first few acts aren’t to inspiring, Blakfish are actually quite interesting. Hawking back to the days when emo wasn’t the dirty word it is now, they have the angular guitar stabs and impassioned wails of late 90s acts like Kids Near Water down to a tee. A welcome revival of a lost art.

However, sometimes revival isn’t a good thing: witness The Painted Smile, whose take on good time garage rock has plenty of huff but no puff, despite the exertions of ex-Sikth frontman Mikee. Most of their set is a mush of distorted bass and not much else, with only the last two songs opting for some Jon Spencer Blues Explosion-style dynamics – a wise move that hints at their true potential.

The Morning After also try their hand at mixing things up, but inadvisably go for mixing speed metal with classic rock styling. And then when it couldn’t get more incongruous (i.e. wank), they tumble into a lazy metalcore breakdown. Back to the drawing board, lads.

It’s up to Xerath to show the way. A brutal approach: a massive polyrhythmic bulldozer in the key of Meshuggah that smashes everything in its path. A touch more guitars would have been nice, but who can argue with something that could be used to smash the tits off the Statue of Liberty?

There’s certainly no arguing with No Made Sense, who can be said seamlessly bridge the gap between Neurosis and Mastodon, with a touch of Oceansize’s swelling other-worldliness, but in truth there’s no defining them other than on their own epic terms. By turns majestic and terrifying, No Made Sense are as essential live as on record. SJ

Tesseract pick up where fellow label mates No Made Sense left off. Complex rhythm structures cultivate an edge of brutality and melody what many rising upstarts fail to achieve.  Basick Records is truly the label to watch.

Over on the lovely big stage, where the atmosphere at least feels at least a little festive, morose Swedes Katatonia bring the doom, gloom and beauty in their own, unique way. Tracks such as ‘My Twin’ and ‘July’ don’t fail to impress and delight this evening’s onlookers.

Possibly one of the most emotive bands in the UK right now, if only they’d pull their fingers out and release that damn album! Anathema perform an electrifying and charming set mainly focussing on the ‘Alternative 4’ album, however a surprise spot for ‘Sleepless’ with no other than old vocalist Darren White proves to be a touching yet fun moment for them and the fans as well. LM

Over on the Terrorizer stage, Ingested are not letting the trifling matter that they’re playing to a few people in a conference room hold them back. A healthy mix of urbanised death metal and blood-splattered beatdowns, they should be essential slam pit material. SJ

 

You will never see a more energetic and enjoyably obnoxious band than Norway’s The Cumshots, simple as!
Fronted by a man that can only be described as a monstrous personality with a hilarious sense of self destruction, Max Cargo is every boyfriend’s worst nightmare! He skulks his 6ft 6 tattooed frame around the stage with his nut sack and engagement ring at the ready for any little bit of gash prepared to take it and by god they will! Songs such as ‘Bitter Erection’ and the excellently relatable ‘I Still Drink Alone’ roll out with no care in the world other than a good riff, a drink, a pair of tits and Max’s dear old Mum. The best live band ever! LM

It’s hard to see where Imperial Vengence are going with their Impaled Nazarene-style metal. Certainly you can applaud the costumes, but in the sterile surroundings and without a light show, the audience would wander if it wasn’t for the fact the truly appalling Spit Like This are playing on the other stage. Give them a stage large enough to go with their theatrics, and they might be onto a winner. SJ

Usually found brooding in black in the Yorkshire dales, My Dying Bride perform with precision tonight and really impress with a rounded set that thankfully made coming to this disinfected shit brick venue slightly worth it today.

A good weekend, thanks to every band present, but never should it be in this barren, corporate conference shit heap again! End of! LM